Four Years

It's four years now since my dad passed away.

Dad wasn't perfect. There were hurts in our family while I was growing up, as a result of some of Dad's actions. Some of those wounds were healed before he died, and for that I am most grateful.

He never gave any indication that he was a believer, so that part is difficult. I never prayed so hard for him as I did when he lay in the hospital a half a country away from me in his last days. I have a calm about it now. I wouldn't go so far as to say a peace, but I don't freak out about it. I pray that God saved my dad from the jaws of eternal punishment at the last minute. Which is kind of funny now that I think about it, because my dad was always late for everything. Maybe, by God's grace, he barely squeaked into heaven.

You know, in a way I guess we ALL actually barely squeak into heaven. Based upon our own merit, none of us would be there. But then, for some unknown reason, God chooses us. Imperfect, sinful us. Plucked from the pit and raised up. A most amazing gift.

"Come Down, O Love Divine"

I posted this hymn last year because we had sung it in church and I loved the alto part. Now, our church is going Emergent and Seeker Friendly. Our family is mourning the loss of rich liturgy and hymns, so I wanted to post this hymn again.

I wrote this last year:
As I reflect over the past year, I see the events that have shaped me: our son's hospitalization and recovery from a broken leg, persecution from some family members, my mother's near death experience, and our daughter's grief over adoption/loss issues. Whew! What a year it's been! I have been sustained by the Holy Spirit, Who prayed for me when I could only groan. Praise God for His infinite mercy!

It hardly seems like a whole year has passed since I wrote that. Some issues are fading. Others are still uppermost in my daily life. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit continues to sustain me through it all.

"Come Down, O Love Divine"

Come down, O love divine,
seek thou this soul of mine,
and visit it with thine own ardor glowing;
O Comforter, draw near,
within my heart appear,
and kindle it, thy holy flame bestowing.

O let it freely burn,
till earthly passions turn
to dust and ashes in its heat consuming;
and let thy glorious light
shine ever on my sight,
and clothe me round, the while my path illuming.

Let holy charity
mine outward vesture be,
and lowliness become mine inner clothing;
true lowliness of heart,
which takes the humbler part,
and o'er its own shortcomings weeps with loathing.

And so the yearning strong,
with which the soul will long,
shall far outpass the power of human telling;
for none can guess its grace,
till Love create a place
wherein the Holy Spirit makes a dwelling.

Branded

My daughter and I went to our friends' ranch for their annual calf branding on Saturday. The calves waiting to be branded huddled together in the farthest reaches of their pen as the cowboys rode in atop their horses. The calves shied away, but the skillful ranchers were able to deftly (and magically) get their ropes around the calves' back legs and pull them out of the pen. Some calves immediately rolled over on their backs, which made the dragging out much easier on them. Others fought it with all their strength. They pawed the ground in futility with their front legs until finally they, too, succumbed and were flipped over on their backs.

Once on the ground, the calf was suddenly held down by a couple of men. A team darted in for the shot, the brand, cauterizing of the horns, pouring of the liquid that will keep the flies off the tender skin at the brand site, (and castration, for the males). It's usually over before the calf knows what hit them. They are patted on the rump and sent off with the others to wait until they can be released to pair up with their mothers.

I got to thinking that this is a lot like God calling us to Himself. Of course, He's the skillful one atop the horse. We're the ones cowering in the corner, unsure of that Presence in our midst. He magically catches us and takes us to a place where at first glance, there is lots of pain. But it turns out that the pain is for our own good. It is a part of life, and it is what helps us to thrive. And although it appears we are released to resume our old life, we are forever changed.

We are His.

(photo taken at the Saturday branding)