Fate. Destiny. Reality. Free will. God's will.
These are thoughts that consume man's mind, if he will but let them. Even a non-Christian will wrestle with these aspects of life on earth. They can be quite nebulous, just like the (accidental) photograph above. They are hard to figure out and difficult to grasp.
Perhaps that is why I, and so many other non-TV watchers, enjoy the TV show, Lost
. Sure, the survivors in the island are dealing with the physical and emotional realities of being stranded on a mysterious for most of the show's 5+ year tenure. But, the ideas of man's free will vs. God's will (or in the case of Lost
, perhaps, the island's will) figure quite prominently in the story lines. (Or in the case of Lost
, perhaps it's more accurate to say, the island's will.)
Some of these thoughts have served to make me most grateful that I am taking the Beyond Consequences Online Parenting Class
right now. The class is not only helping me understand our daughter and more effectively help her, but it is helping me understand and process what's going on surrounding our divorce.
The chapter we've been reading for the past two weeks has to do with the fact that our own past hurts, anger, and unresolved issues are unearthed when you parent a troubled child. I know this sounds like a crock of psychobabble, but the way I am able to apply it to my life is very real and has been a Godsend. It would have helped me with our daughter, but the fact that much of it also applies to my divorce is what makes me believe that God's hand is in the convergence of this class and my current struggles.
Some of the thoughts I've gleaned from this chapter, which apply to both parenting a difficult child and going through a divorce, are:
~ Feelings of anger are normal and to be expected.
~ Current hurt unearths past hurt.
~ Anger can serve to protect you from painful memories.
~ Unchecked anger causes you to act out of fear, causes you to blame others, and becomes destructive.
The whole free will/God's will balance is one I don't think we'll ever adequately figure out, this side of heaven. I just know that because of the things this class has caused me to think about, our daughter is doing better. And, I'm better able to help steer both myself and my kids through this unpleasant sea of divorce.Rejoice always,
pray without ceasing,
in everything give thanks;
for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
I Thessalonians 5: 16-18 NKJV
(photo taken by our daughter in a restaurant - we were being silly, and she must have moved)
Labels: Beyond Consequences, divorce, our daughter, parenting, trials